My Crohn's and Colitis Blog » Colitis Flare » I give up
I give up
Question:
Hi Sunshyn– I’m sorry for what you’re going through. :( I just want to give you one little word of encouragement regarding the colitis flareup…I don’t know much about colitis, but I do know that it’s common to have bowel troubles immediately following abdominal surgery. After my first (and only) lap in 1997, I had a really bad attack about once a week–intense cramping, diarrhea, pain so bad I wanted to throw up. This happened for four weeks in a row, and I started to get concerned. So I did a little research, and in that process I discovered that many people have problems like this after abdominal surgeries. That made me feel so much better! Sure enough, the regular attacks went away after a few weeks. In addition, I also found out that the colon is controlled by the nervous system. You probably know that! But still, it explained a whole lot to me–why my bowel symptoms would act up when I was anxious or upset, or had had a lot of coffee (caffeine stimulating the nervous system). So it’s likely that your struggles in your relationship are contributing to your bowel troubles. (Talk about your catch-22. :P) I’ll keep you in my prayers. I don’t even know you, but I know that you’re not worthy of the poor treatment you received at the hands of your SO. Take care– ~Jackie
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I was barely recovered from my lap when a colitis flare up (my first very bad one) started getting really awful. The GI I decided to try rescheduled my emergency appointment for tomorrow. I found out that my SO has been in the planning stages of a relationship with a woman whom he knows I distrust. Today, he chose to go with her rather than to try to make it work with me. It turns out that he’d given up on us ever getting our physical relationship back so I guess I really shouldn’t have bothered going through with the lap. — -Sunshyn "I’m not shy. I’m studying my prey."
Response:
Yeah, what Mary and Carey said….add a what Sherry said to that!!!
And Kim W I too was with someone for one of my surgeries. He brought me home from the clinic and went to get my pain meds and didn’t come back for 3 days. After grieving for it all I began to live life for me. I met my wonderful DH and he married me knowing full well what the future might hold and sure enough not long after marriage I had another surgery. He has been wonderful. So there is someone for you. It hurts now but in the long run you’ll be better off. Years down the road you’ll look back and say "why did I even give it so much ofmy energy" Keep that energy for you and your healing. If you can swing it talk to a counselor just to help you through the tuff time right now. Kim W – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –
Response:
Yeah, what Mary and Carey said….add a what Sherry said to that!!! Giving up is not an option!!! That lap was to make you feel better, not just so he could have sex. If a physical relationship was all he wanted, then you are much better off without him. Believe it or not, there are men that don’t that actually care more about their SO’s health than they do sex. I’ll admit, they are hard to find, but they are out there. Just concentrate on getting yourself healthy first. Enjoy the time you have alone. While I love my SO, I really liked living alone also. Love seems to come when you least expect it in the strangest ways. It will come for you too! Sherry
Response:
Sunshyn, I agree with Carey. While you might feel devastated right now, what has really happened is that you have an opportunity not only to get yourself better, but an opportunity to get a better, healthy relationship. A man who would leave you for those reasons, does not really love you, he loved something else. Consider yourself lucky that you can now search for someone who WILL support you ALL the time no matter what–or be happy on your own. Think about it this way–What would’ve happened to this relationship when the sex got old or you got old? What would have happened to the relationship then? Love yourself first, work on healing yourself, and gain strength from those who ARE there for you in your hour of need. I will say a prayer for you…… Good Luck, Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – That lap was for YOU Sunshyne, not him. What really matters is for you to feel better and to receive proper treatment, and not for his sake. If he couldn’t wait and support you thru this horrible time, maybe you are better off without him. I know that might sound harsh and I don’t mean to cause you more pain. I just know that sometimes it’s better to let someone leave you, because there is someone who will love you endo and all waiting in the wings. I wish this for you and I hope you feel better soon. Carey — John’s page: MENDO – Men and Endometriosis: http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Spa/8449/ Carey’s Endo Window with Endo Sister’s Survival Kit: http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Spa/8509/ I was barely recovered from my lap when a colitis flare up (my first very bad one) started getting really awful. The GI I decided to try rescheduled my emergency appointment for tomorrow. I found out that my SO has been in the planning stages of a relationship with a woman whom he knows I distrust. Today, he chose to go with her rather than to try to make it work with me. It turns out that he’d given up on us ever getting our physical relationship back so I guess I really shouldn’t have bothered going through with the lap. — -Sunshyn "I’m not shy. I’m studying my prey."
Response:
That lap was for YOU Sunshyne, not him. What really matters is for you to feel better and to receive proper treatment, and not for his sake. If he couldn’t wait and support you thru this horrible time, maybe you are better off without him. I know that might sound harsh and I don’t mean to cause you more pain. I just know that sometimes it’s better to let someone leave you, because there is someone who will love you endo and all waiting in the wings. I wish this for you and I hope you feel better soon. Carey — John’s page: MENDO – Men and Endometriosis: http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Spa/8449/ Carey’s Endo Window with Endo Sister’s Survival Kit: http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Spa/8509/
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I was barely recovered from my lap when a colitis flare up (my first very bad one) started getting really awful. The GI I decided to try rescheduled my emergency appointment for tomorrow. I found out that my SO has been in the planning stages of a relationship with a woman whom he knows I distrust. Today, he chose to go with her rather than to try to make it work with me. It turns out that he’d given up on us ever getting our physical relationship back so I guess I really shouldn’t have bothered going through with the lap. — -Sunshyn "I’m not shy. I’m studying my prey."
Response:
I was barely recovered from my lap when a colitis flare up (my first very bad one) started getting really awful. The GI I decided to try rescheduled my emergency appointment for tomorrow. I found out that my SO has been in the planning stages of a relationship with a woman whom he knows I distrust. Today, he chose to go with her rather than to try to make it work with me. It turns out that he’d given up on us ever getting our physical relationship back so I guess I really shouldn’t have bothered going through with the lap. — -Sunshyn "I’m not shy. I’m studying my prey."
Response:
We are behind you! This time is for you, don’t let that good for nothin’ keep you from happiness and health. This is your time to feel better and to find yourself a knight. Take care and let us know how you’re doing!!! Clare C. lisa simpson: "what are you reading mr flanders?" ned flanders: "everything but the opinion page. i don’t need to be told what
Response:
What’s that saying," if you set it free and it comes back, it’s yours, but if it doesn’t it wasn’t yours in the first place" I’ve been there and I thank god that he did leave because I found my soul mate afterwards. Remember YOU are the important one in this, not the SO…. Worry about yourself getting better and take life one day at a time. You deserve the best. so why settle for less!!!! Hugs,Celeste
Response:
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